|
profile
the girl next door  HUISHAN (: National University of Singapore 17 March ♥ ♥ ♥ |
playlist
sing along
|
affiliates
you're on your way |
Friday, April 4, 2008
i went away just when you needed me sohad a really lousy week
like so zzz. totally sian about everything.
i kept bombarding myself with lots of questions,
and i just keep thinking. really hard bout why things turn out so bad.
i want to remove all the negative thoughts i had but i just cant.
lousy results. like darn lousy, so much so that i feel like tearing up my chem paper. was super duper disppointed with the kind of results i was getting for chem. and i didnt even feel like doing corrections for my chem paper. esp for the essay part. i failed terribly. like 13/40 or somewhere along there when i used to get like 27/30 last yr.
and knowing that im feeling that upset alr.
some pple still keep rubbing on my wounds and made things worse.
and now i think i would maybe have to drop one of my H2s,
or maybe not. if i managed to convince the hod to allow me to continue wif 4H2s next week. but the problem is, im not even sure if i shld continue wif 4H2s.
anyway i was also pretty upset bout my fren A
it all happened on err. i forgot which day la.
but it goes like this.
fren B and i was really bored and we started talking bout like whatever we can think of luh. results schoolwork family and everything.
and so happened, we mentioned bout fren C, and we laughed. like really loud.
den fren C told fren A that we were talking bad bout fren A
like wow, friends for 1yr or more alr.
now then i realised, that's what she thinks of me.
yes im really disappointed.
how could you just jump into conclusion luh, and for goodness sake, we were laughing bout a totally different matter.
im seriously wondering why people change so easily.
people whom i thought to be really nice and caring werent so now.
whereas those whom im not as close turned out to care of me even more.
sigh and this led me to think bout what i was thinking on monday.
on how fragil friendship can turn out to be.
a friend i have known for 5yrs, my so called good friend becomes a hi bye friend whom doesnt even remember my birthday when my jjc friend (whom i know only for 3mths during pae) actually remembers. how funny can this be. friends whom i haven been seeing, like ian, royston, sinhoe and blah remembers. yet you dont. HAA
yea i know it's not possible to have enough time to sustain all our social interactions but i hope after jc, i can still keep in touch with at least 20% of my friends in class and in bball. and as for now, just enjoy the remaining few mths wif one another. haa
and talking about class.
hurhur my class is super not united.
cause there're like two groups of pple.
one group feels that having good grades cause you mug for it means you're not smart or simply lousy. another group of people believes in the "you reap what you sow" kind of theory. and i think it's very sad for us to make awful comments bout one another. especially behind their backs. cause i thought as a class, we shld work hard tgt. encourage one another. and make constructive comments to help one another and not say things like, ' hur, study so hard but results still so lousy' behind one another's back. another problem was about doing homework luh. what's wrong about doing homework. being on task and following lectures means you are mugger? like huh?? i wan to do hw and pay attention in class is because i don wanna fail my papers anymore. like really sian with all the Us alr. and i finished up my maths ytd was because monday need go thru alr and tmr i would be out the whole day wif my bball clique. and i need sunday to do the rest of my homework, and rest before the entire week starts all over again right. ahh, why am i explaining all these. but anw being friends, doesnt just meant having company.but rather, it;s to be frank about almost everything. haa i find it seriously
stupid to lie to your friends about how much you study and everything. like what do you actually gain? by helping others, and explaining what they donno, you not only help them, you help yourself too by understanding the concept better right. haa enough said, cause i think it's stupid to keep on babbling and babbling bout the same matter. but anw, i tink our class people need to really reflect bout this matter la, if not the results are not going to improve. cause this kind of studying environment is really lousy.
and besides that, cca is another sad thing.
cause i was really demoralised.
but i think today's training was better.
thou i wanted to cry initially.
cause the situation was like so tense up luh.
and i was performing like really lousy.
very disappointed la, but i think im improving bit by bit la
hopefully the 5of us(my bball clique) can get into the team.
cause we trained so hard tgt, inside and outside sch
and i don wanna see any of our effort go to waste luh.
yes, we trained hard. keep laughing doesnt mean we're not serious.
if we also face black black den training wouldnt be filled with joy.
cause when i step down and looked back, i want to picture trainings filled with joy and laughter, with all our hard work being paid off.
haha anw i think i shall stop here.
im tired of typing and typing non stop.
this entry is super long.
bye people.
anyway, happy birthday dilys!
seeyou 10hours later. lol
and girls, thanks for the teddy bear. i like it alot (: